Interestingly, this time round the hubby and I have decided not to find out the baby’s flavour. With Miss IG, it was a no-brainer. We both needed to know: we wanted to be able to bond with a definitive sex of bump and prepare by buying everything in the gender appropriate colour ways (yes, we were those people buying into a pink pram without a care for future siblings).
With Bump 2 we had more of a debate on our hands. Knowing the monumental marathon of labour ahead, I felt quite strongly that the element of surprise might provide incentive to keep me going. But even stronger for both of us was the knowledge that – assuming Bump 2 arrives safely – this will be our last baby (out of choice) and therefore our last chance to enjoy that big delivery room reveal. So – almost begrudgingly – at our 20 week scan we opted out.
Will we be overcome with unconditional joy regardless of sex?
And now we’re both a bit nervous. Because, no matter when you find out, there is always an element of… disappointment? Grief? I’m not sure how best to sum it up – it’s a bit awkward. But I think it’s honest to say that going from the excitement of envisioning all associated pink V blue scenarios, to a factual knowledge of the situation will be hard.
There’s a part of you that has to pack up those alternative imaginings whilst also being eternally grateful for the hand that you have been dealt, regardless of any preference you may have had. Which having spent so much time indulging in, ultimately now counts for nothing.
Finding out during a scan for Baby no. 1, these emotions were simpler to handle – but at the event itself? Clearly healthy is the primary wish – no question. But will we be overcome with unconditional joy regardless of sex? Or will one or both of us secretly hanker for that sister or brother never to be?
I guess we have no choice but to wait and see….
3 other secret labour room worries
1.When do I have to take my knickers off?
2.Will I pee, poo or vomit in front of everyone?
3.How will I really feel about becoming a mother? And will I be any good?